Second Verse Same as the First

All things considered, this week is very similar to last week. We have two couples in the house, Brenchel is in full effect and Lawon is contributing just as much now as he did all season. Lawon’s departure from the game was not surprising given the antics of the HouseGuests in Week 5, but Brendon’s return with over a million votes cast in his favor was a shocker to those online. Many (including this blogger) assumed that the vote would come down to Cassi and Dom. Clearly, we were mistaken.

In retrospect, however, this isn’t much of a surprise at all. There are two things that Big Brother fans adore more than anything- drama, and stupidity. Brendon’s return provides the drama. Unfortunately, Kalia provided the stupidity in spades this week. Kalia wasted the week, lost an ally and put in a weak competitor against a strong returning game player. Part of this is not her fault- the HouseGuests had no idea that former players would return, and putting Lawon in against a returning Brendon was unforeseeable. Still…

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Kalia Me, On The Line!

A newbie finally won HOH, when in a strange sort of psychic pattern, Kalia answered questions on last Thursday night’s quiz like Ralph Fiennes in the movie Quiz Show. Everyone was thrown off track, including Rachel who promised to avenge Brendon’s eviction.

Then came groveling visits to the HOH room. Rachel made a special appearance, looking very plain sans makeup. She repeatedly used the word respect in regards to Kalia’s win and game play, “I respect you. I really, really respect you.” Yet just a few hours before, Rachel had no respect at all for the sex blogger. I guess when your ash is on the line, anything goes. Frankly I was glad to see Rachel fighting to stay. I was beginning to worry that she had given up. Not so!

In a surprise twist, Jordan was the one who showed some rebellion. She got in Kalia’s face in response to being told Jeff would be a pawn. The reason being that Jeff would win Veto, take himself off the block, and somehow Rachel would go home. It didn’t make any sense, but that’s almost what happened. Jeff won the veto, but Lawon went on the block and appears to be targeted for eviction.

Daniele’s father denounced her game play endlessly this week. He was correct in his assessment, but it doesn’t take a genius to see why a rift has formed in the Donato family. Maybe he could learn to tame his words just once for his own blood, because what he’s doing now sure doesn’t work.

Back to Kalia. Rather than serving her HOH rein in a calm, strategic manner, she wasted time with emotional reasoning. She completely forgot that no matter who she evicts this week, they might come back to haunt her on the very same evening. She made a total mess of it, and I predict a wild show tonight. No matter who comes back, they’ll be all about respect and intent on revenge.

Lawon Goes Up

Jeff took himself off the block earlier this morning. Unbelievably, Lawon volunteered to be the replacement nominee, so Kalia put him on the block. Lawon is under the mistaken impression that if he’s evicted, he’ll walk right back into the game. Trusting Shelly is the worst move that Kalia could have made.

Daniele and Kalia plan to ambush Rachel on Thursday and offer a deal for her to stay. Kalia openly wonders if that’s a good idea saying, “But what if Shelly and Adam make a deal with her first?” So sorry Kalia, it’s already been done. No doubt about it, the first time a noobie won HOH has been, and will continue to be, packed with drama.

Lawon Wins Big Brother Darwin Award

The last twelve hours have had some of the strangest twists & turns ever to occur on any of the thirteen Big Brother seasons. Shelly got the ball rolling with a masterful mental control move on Kalia. It worked far more powerfully than Shelly might have hoped, because at the end of the night Kalia had screwed herself and Dani into the ground, to the point of oblivion.

Worse, Lawon volunteered to make a suicide move without blinking, in fact he’s happy about it. Darwin’s theory depends on people as foolish as Lawon removing themselves from the gene pool, and he epitomizes the process. The pertinent Tweets are below, mostly in sequence, as the deal went down. All by @bbchatter unless otherwise noted.

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Reality TV Psych Out

Have you ever thought about the psychological disadvantage of being on a show like Big Brother, and whether what we see is pure reality? Is reality TV a joke? What IS reality? Do I sound like Doug Henning? I’ve pondered it a bit and think that this season, over any other, is a good example of how someone’s personal life can become so compressed with fake conflict that they literally begin to falter with the truth. Take Daniele who started this game barely speaking to her father, and now in his absence has taken on his characteristics in order to survive. Is she behaving in a reality based way, or are we seeing an authentic Danielle? Whatever it is, it suits her well IN THIS GAME.

On the other hand, you have Rachel and Brendon who are so affected by their relationship with the other contestants that they’ve banded together and are vowing to death do us part, only this ain’t death, it’s just Big Brother. Theirs is poisonous relationship folks, and the show has brought it to the surface, for better or worse. Brendon controls Rachel way too much and, even though she’s a drama queen, she doesn’t deserve to be treated the way he treats her. So . . . don’t slip on that ring, don’t kiss the bride. Brendon, take a step outside.

I wonder what would happen to me should I ever get picked to be on Big Brother? Well, first of all, they wouldn’t pick me because I sing too much and I look like hell in the morning, but barring all that and I actually did make it on, what would happen? Would all my normal sensible reactions go off kilter? Would I switch to attack/survival mode without even knowing? Would I start eating all the time, like Kalia? Would bathrobes become the most important treasure in my life, like Lawon? Is it like Ghostbusters where all your fears come to life a la giant Stay Puft marshmallow dude? It’s a bad trip on that show, man. Whoever gets to the end deserves the money. And forgiveness. And a vacation from reality.

You Play To Win The Game

We are on Day 24 of Big Brother 13, and already we’ve seen game playing the likes of which you don’t normally get this early. There has been backstabbing, hinky voting; the game has kicked into high gear.  Normally it’s tough to judge the game being played this early on. However, as a feedwatcher and fan it is my Grodner-given right to play armchair houseguest and calls ’em likes I sees ’em! Here’s my take on the Big Brother 13 houseguests’  games so far:

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LaYawn, I mean Lawon, thinks he’s going to be the bad guy known for his bubbly personality & charisma. Confused much? This self described “handsome-fied handsome-sexy multi-vitamin of sunshine” thinks he’s blazing new ground with his WeHo-inspired clothing and his nightly green facial masks. Only heard of him an hour ago and I’m already so over it.